To the Cleveland Indians Management,
Please don’t take this personal…as we know it’s really all just a business—and a game of course too—but a business. I appreciate what you all are trying to do with the redecorating…re-pricing and repackaging—but frankly avoiding or not seriously addressing the core issues—similar to our current political “leaders”. I want just one thing….just one thing matters to me—-that’s wins. Enough of them to get to the playoffs and win a world championship. That’s it. No hot dogs races—-no pictures with the players—-no rock n blast….just wins! I’ll eat nasty hot dogs….drink warm beer and stand in long lines to do anything there at the park in place of these side shows—–if it leads to us raising the World Series banner for The Cleveland Indians over Progressive Field in my Lifetime.
I’ve been waiting—we’ve been waiting a long long time….rooting…agonizing and paying for over 45 years—others as long as 64…and it’s going in the wrong direction….again. It’s time to win. And as Mitt said last night….”If you were hired to do a job and fail….you’re not a bad person…but it’s time go—it’s time for someone else’s plan”. I hope the stewards of OUR baseball franchise realize that—and do the right thing.
Well I’m back from my summer travels now and in the interest of the coming election season, mud-slinging, crap we’re all about to be exposed to, I’d like to start with this question. Do we Really NEED more construction jobs ? REALLY ? It seems that EVERYWHERE I go, or traveled the last few months, on every road, major or minor, there is CONSTRUCTION. there is NO Route that you can travel without running into delays for construction. It’s actually incredible. I can’t really remember a time when there was SO MUCH going on to delay and disrupt the roads and highways. So when I hear the President and his people talk about needing to “create more Construction Jobs” to “Fix our Infrastructure”, I have to laugh. From what I can see in a lot of states it’s being worked on RIGHT NOW. Any MORE and we couldn’t drive anyplace. (I guess that would save Gasoline…..hmmmmmmmm ???) CUT GOVERNMENT SPENDING ! REDUCE TAXES ! (hey, great to be back !)
The Indians welcomed former star Albert Belle into training camp for the first time back since he left the team. While Albert was the most intimating batter I have ever seen, and who could stare at a pitcher and make them feel like they would be instantly murdered if they dared to hit him…I wonder WHY and WHAT the Indians think that Albert can teach the rookies ? How to cork a bat ? How to deal with the media ? How to throw a ball from the outfield and hit a fan in the chest in the bleachers ? How to play long toss before the game and accidentally hit a reporter in front of the dugout. How to groom your local image with the community, especially on holidays like Halloween and how to save money on not having to buy candy for the kids. And the biggest advice might just be, the benefits of changing your name. Fausto Carmona already knows about that one.
I have been taking some time to reflect and digest all that has been happening and have decided to return to the blog with a collection of some of the better Obama jokes that have come from late night TV hosts we know and love, and that really reflect my political feelings. Read on and above all else, smile.
The liberals are asking us to give Obama time.
We agree…and think 25 to life would be appropriate.
America needs Obama-care like Nancy Pelosi needs a Halloween mask.
Q: Have you heard about McDonald’s’ new Obama Value Meal?
A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it.
Q: What does Barack Obama call lunch with a convicted felon?
A: A fund raiser.
Q: What’s the difference between Obama’s cabinet and a penitentiary?
A: One is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers, and threats to society. The other is for housing prisoners.
Q: If Nancy Pelosi and Obama were on a boat in the middle of the ocean and it
started to sink, who would be saved?
A: America !
Q: What’s the difference between Obama and his dog, Bo?
A: Bo has papers.
Q: What was the most positive result of the “Cash for Clunkers” program?
A: It took 95% of the Obama bumper stickers off the road.
Where did “piss poor” come from?
We older people need to learn something new every day —
just to keep the grey matter tuned up.
Where did “Piss Poor” come from?
They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot
and then once a day it was taken and sold to the tannery. If you had to do this to survive you were “Piss Poor.”
But worse than that were the really
poor folk who couldn’t even afford to buy a pot — they “didn’t have a pot to piss in,” and were the lowest of the low.
The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature
isn’t just how you like it, think about how things used to be.
Here are some facts about the 1500s:
Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May,
and they still smelled pretty good by June. However, since they were starting to smell, brides carried a “bouquet of flowers” to hide the body odor.
Hence the custom today of carrying a
bouquet when getting married.
Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water.
The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water,
then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children.
Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, “Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water!”
Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath.
It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals(mice, bugs) lived in the roof.
When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals
would slip and fall off the roof. Hence the saying, “It’s raining cats and dogs.”
There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house.
This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings
could mess up your nice clean bed.
Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That’s how “canopy beds” came into existence.
The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt.
Hence the saying, “Dirt poor.”
The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery
in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way. Hence: a “thresh hold.”
(Getting quite an education, aren’t you?)
In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start
over the next day.
Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while.
Hence the rhyme: “Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old.”
Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special.
When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off.
It was a sign of wealth that a man could, “bring home the bacon.”
They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and “chew the fat.”
Those with money had plates made of pewter.
Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food,
causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes,
so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.
Bread was divided according to status.
Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle,
and guests got the top, or the “upper crust.”
Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky.
The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days.
Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial.
They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up.
Hence the custom
of “holding a wake.”
England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people.
So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks
on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive.
So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin
and up through the ground and tie it to a bell.
Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (“the graveyard shift”)
to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be,
“saved by the bell,”or was considered “a dead ringer.”
And that’s the truth.
Now, whoever said History was boring!!!?
Merry Christmas and Warm Wishes for a wonderful New Year !!!!!
The SUPER COMMITTEE from Congress that has had MONTHS to meet and figure out how to cut their spending, has FAILED at being able to decide ANYTHING. They are ALL SO dug in with spending the money (OUR Money) they can’t even do their jobs. Why aren’t I surprised ? If we as a people do not VOTE OUT just about EVERYONE who is there, and give a new crew a crack at it, we are all STUPID A-HOLES WHO DESERVE ALL THE PAIN THAT COMES OUR WAY FROM THIS LOSER GOVERNMENT.
Here’s a GREAT idea. Go ahead and make the statue of Jim Thome because you said you were going to, BUT…we don’t have to KEEP it. We should SELL IT to Philly and they can STICK IT RIGHT UP their Art Museum Steps and put it where the Rocky statue used to stand. Heck sell it to them for half price. We might as well get some cash outta that hunk of useless metal or concrete.
Wow…the “hits” just keep on coming when it comes to bad behavior and violations in college football. NOW we find out that Penn State Coach Jerry Sandusky is accused of molesting at least 9 boys over 15 years while coaching at Penn State with the last allegation from 2009. The story goes that Joe Paterno, head coach, found out about it early on and reported it to the Athletic Director and the powers that be, and I guess felt he had done what he could have and should have. WRONG. He could have marched over to good ‘ol Jerry’s office and broken a figurative chair over his head. A little….WTF are you DOING you PERVERT, get the FK outta my University and OFF this Football team. The story says that Jerry was even observed in the shower doing sexual things to a boy and nothing happened !!! Well throw this A-Hole in the most depraved prison for a long time so he can get plenty of what he desires, and as for Joe Paterno….Sorry Joe…..Say it Ain’t SO Joe……but unfortunately is looks like it IS SO, Joe…you gotta GO ! A sad ending to a record breaking career. If Jim Tressel had to leave because some of his players traded their crap for Tattoos and it went un-reported, then Joe Pa needs to go for not protecting his kids from this monster that he KNEW was in his camp.
Jim Thome at 41 and with a broken down back, says he wants to play one more year instead of playing in his back yard. So what does he do ? After coming back to Cleveland and most of the fans re-warming up to him after leaving the FIRST time for more money and the infamous “you’ll have to tear the jersey off my back” line…..AND the Indians tribute to him, including a STATUE in the plaza…..he decides in his country wisdom to sign a contract for another year and go back to the Phillies as a pinch hitter. I’m sure it is to finish his career with a Charlie Manuel tour, but what are WE supposed to do now? Do we still build that statue ? If so ..what uniform should he wear ? Should we have a stone Phillie Cap on his head ? What are the chances that the statue if built will receive more spit and thrown objects including verbal abuse as soon as it’s built. And that’s the problem with building statues to people who are still alive…they have time to do something else to screw it all up. Smooth move Jimmy !!!!!!!!!
The cash comes too easily to the already rich in this time of need for so many. Now we hear the latest way to have products promoted. Have celebs “tweet” about them to their “peeps”. The latest example being Old Navy who reportedly paid Khloe Kardashian $8,000.00 to tweet that her Old Navy Jeans make her “Butt Look Scary Good”. Maybe I’m alone, but I have had enough of the Kardashians. It’s time to stop trying to keep up , and leave them alone to their ego centric life of no real talent or skill we know of and scamming us all. Like the wedding scam by her sister Kim who never intended on getting or staying married the stories say, but only did it for the $18 Million plus she received. Hey, as far as I’m concerned, they’re all nothing more than a family of hookers who would be totally useless and broke if it were not for their sex. High priced hookers at that, and in the end, SOMEONE has to do that job, so they’re as good to laugh at as look at…and in the end…that’s what they are paid for.